


My Darling Dear

by Seffiron



Category: Tales of Arcadia (Cartoons)
Genre: Comfort, Cuddling, F/M, Hallucinations, Nightmares, Sex, Trauma, Vaginal Sex, climax, handjob, post-season 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-12 20:20:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29141403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seffiron/pseuds/Seffiron
Summary: Perhaps that was why her consciousness found him so alluring. Why they fit together despite everything they had done to hurt one another, and why she didn’t flinch from his touch despite the fact that her nightmares all but centered around his kind and the king he once swore allegiance to.“Life was never meant to be fair.”The words weren’t cold, exactly, but they bore so much hurt Barbara felt herself get angry on his behalf. She was spoiled compared to everything that had happened to the man that called himself Walter Strickler.
Relationships: Barbara Lake/Walter Strickler | Stricklander
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	1. Ghosts

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was started almost immediately after I finished "Twist of the Blade", but I found myself struggling to finish it.  
> I am sort of happy with how it turned out, though there are some things I would've liked to change - but have it anyway!
> 
> It takes place some months after "Twist of The Blade", though I'm not sure I will make a series out of these - probably not.  
> \------------------------------
> 
> Barbara has night terrors, and Strickler just wants to protect her. In the end, they both need each other to make it through the night.

Barbara heaved in a heavy lungful of air, thrashing, and kicking as she did so, trying desperately to fight off the invisible enemy that clung to her.  
She could feel the clawed hands, the stone texture and, the foul breath clouding her senses.  
She felt the safety of Heart Stone around her, but also how it cried out – begging for her help. Begging for her to save it.  
It was dying, and this beast that was laying claim to her mortal soul was the culprit.

Barbara lashed out with a hand, hitting a strong dark jaw in her dream, but nothing but thin air in the waking world. She felt the chuckle from the large beast all the way inside her bones, and she shuddered intensely.  
He grabbed her by the arm, hoisted her up into the air as if she was nothing, and she felt his tusks close to her ear – _“I am going to enjoy devouring you”.  
_   
She was shaking as she dangled there - both from the effort of trying to pull away and from the thin layer of perspiration that was now cooling on her skin – and then she shot up in a sitting position, her eyes wide open as a violent scream escaped her.  
  
She blinked once, then twice, and then she felt as if no force in this world or another would ever make her blink again as she stared into the darkness of her bedroom.  
She counted the seconds as they went by, but nothing came for her.  
No cold grip of death came to fling her across the room, no burning yellow eye saw her every lie portrayed on her face as she fought to keep calm.  
She was fine, she was alive, and she had escaped.

Barbara sucked in lungful of air after air, and then the tears started to roll down her face.  
She lifted her hands and buried her head in her palms, pushing them against her closed eyelids as she wept.  
Her shoulders were shaking and her vision was going white with the pressure, but she desperately wanted to remove the image of that… thing, from her consciousness.

Her door flew open and she gave a startled cry at the sudden intrusion, her eyes swollen and red, and her cheeks stained with her tears.  
She looked towards the now open entrance and found two golden orbs surrounding red slits looking back at her.  
She heard his breathing before she noticed how fast his chest was moving, and for a second she thought he was about to pass out from it.  
  
“Barbara! Are you alright!? What happened!?”  
  
But no reply came. She was just staring at him, sitting up in her bed with a face drenched in tears, a slightly shaking body the host of her jittering soul.  
Her nightgown was a mess, her sheets were rumpled up and coiled around her legs and hips, and her heart was going a million miles an hour.  
Her hands were still at her cheeks, the moisture from her tears making them sweaty yet cool at the same time. She shook her head numbly, slowly, not really sure what he had asked her, as her ears were ringing and her pulse was thumping in her ears.  
  
This wasn’t the first time she had dreamt of _him._ It wasn’t the first time the stench of death had accumulated upon her sleeping senses, convincing her body that her corpse would follow next; down and down, into the stomach of the beast.  
The rough texture of his calloused skin, the scars snatching and breaking her own skin as he tore her limb from limb.  
She’d felt her heart break several times this last year alone, but in these dreams, she thought she had no heart at all like it had been torn from her chest while filled to the brim with terror.  
Fear was a natural thing of everything living, but even though Barbara felt she had died more than once, and so couldn’t count herself as alive anymore, it still clung to her like raindrops after a heavy downpour.  
  
The figure in her doorway stood firm. His hand had been at the level of his eyes as he’d swung the door open violently, but now it had sunk slightly, the palm towards the floor but overall stretched towards her – she wanted to take it.

“W-Walt.”

He jerked slightly, but something kept him rooted in place. She could tell he was fighting an internal battle, his head craning slightly to one side and she imagined his mouth was a thin line.

“Please.”

The word sounded so small, so insignificant, but he all but jumped as he hurried to her side.  
Whatever it was that had kept him from coming to her had gone in the blink of an eye, and Barbara was too shaken to even ask or think about it.  
She just knew she needed him at this moment.

The bed dipped slightly as he sat down next to her, his hands finding both her shoulders as he gently rooted her in place. He was an anchor and a point of strength, and Barbara thanked whatever entity had allowed her to at least keep his company after everything that had happened.

She exhaled harshly, the air catching in her lungs as her breath came out stuttering and broken.  
Several tears fell unto her sheets as she hung her head, but this time they were of relief.  
His hand found its way to her right cheek where its thumb brushed away some stray drops. Then he gently guided her face towards his shoulder, and both his hands gently smoothed down her arms.  
  
Like a wave crashing against a shoreline of sharp rocks, Barbara all but fell against him as she let her tired mind finally collapse into some sense of safety. It was as if she could feel her bones shutter at the overstimulation of not knowing what was happening on the outside, and her heart fluttered all the same while shattering over and over again at  
everything that was happening on the inside.

“It’s not fair…” was all she could manage, and she felt him exhale sharply above her.

Fairness wasn’t a concept she was very familiar with. Most of her adult life had been a chain of unfairness creeping up on her every chance it got. James, Jim, Arcadia, the war… trolls.  
Barbara wasn’t sure she could take much more of this, and if these nightmares persisted, she was sure she would be going mad soon.

Perhaps that was why her consciousness found him so alluring. Why they fit together despite everything they had done to hurt one another, and why she didn’t flinch from his touch despite the fact that her nightmares all but centered around his kind and the king he once swore allegiance to.

“Life was never meant to be fair.”  
The words weren’t cold, exactly, but they bore so much hurt Barbara felt herself get angry on his behalf. She was spoiled compared to everything that had happened to the man that called himself Walter Strickler.

Whoever he swore loyalty to these days, be it himself or her, it could only be a dream compared to those ghosts that once tortured and manipulated him. It was no wonder he was a natural liar and deceiver, you could become nothing less when surrounded by family that wanted to see you gutted and left to die.

Every piece of yourself you carried to war and that war was constant. Every day you fought alongside your allies while also guarding against those allies. Keeping an eye over your shoulder every waking moment must’ve been exhausting, and she knew that that was one of the reasons he had reacted so fast when she woke up screaming.  
He’d probably been awake despite it being 4 in the morning just to make sure no one was coming for him… or her.

Nonetheless, every choice he’d ever made had led him to this moment, and yet, most of those choices weren’t even his own. If it weren’t for Bular and his cause, the amulet choosing her son, and the circumstances of the troll village that once existed beneath them, the two of them would’ve never met the way that they did, wouldn’t have become what they now were. But Barbara wanted to believe that they were both better off because of it.  
If anything, they were stronger because of it.

"Ever the enthusiast…” She tried, chuckling.  
He murmured something along the lines of a soothing retort, but he had clear concern forming the words. His hand had started to stroke her hair, and Barbara felt the heat rolling off him as he seethed in some unknown, yet familiar anger.

“I’m sorry, I was the one who started this...” She sighed.  
  
This time he pulled away from her, just an inch, but Barbara grabbed his arms almost as a reflex, afraid that he was leaving her as everyone else had… as he once had.  
He wasn’t though, it would be the cruelest thing ever if he were to leave her again, she tried to reason with herself, and at this point, he wouldn’t do that… right?

“Never apologize. Not for hurting not for anything. Ever. Maybe our lives haven't been fair up to this point, but I am willing to fight to make them better. With you.”  
His eyes were hard and yet reassuring, and they bore desperately into hers as Barbara thought she noticed a red tinge seeping around the pupils.  
They held so many emotions Barbara felt her breath hitch and her heart stammer. He really did care for her, so much. Fresh tears sprang at the corner of her eyes and she felt herself dropping her head to lay it on his chest. _He’s not going anywhere._  
  
“Sleep with me? Or… stay, till I fall asleep?” She trusted he would stay and that his presence would keep the nightmares at bay.  
At least she had gathered as much from their interactions over the past few weeks, and so she wasn’t at all surprised when he pulled her closer once more and let her rest against his collarbone.  
“Always.” He whispered, and Barbara almost felt like laughing.  
  
She was so relieved, and the heavy heart she had woken with just minutes ago seemed to settle more easily in her chest. He really would stay this time.  
She sighed and pressed herself further against him, which earned her a sigh in return and a low hum of approval in his throat.  
It felt nice to be comforted like this, and Barbara was finding that she wished for these interactions to happen more frequently.  
  
“Are… are you wearing your suit?” She was only now noticing the texture of the fabric against her forehead, and he cleared his throat with some unease.  
“I was out. There was some trouble brewing at the outskirts of town… Some trolls from the forest have started to wonder what happened to the trolls that left Trollmarket. We can talk about it tomorrow.” He said reassuringly, and while she was intrigued with the politics, Barbara was starting to feel the fatigue of, once again, waking in a cold sweat and with a stammering heart.  
  
What was this, the third time this week? And it was only Thursday too…  
  
She broke out of her musings when Walter started to shrug the jacket off his shoulders, and Barbara drew back to make it easier for him.  
“Promise you will tell me? I don’t want to be kept out of the loop.” 

She didn’t like being lied to or being kept in the dark, and she hoped that he wouldn’t go back to his secrecy. He was going out in the middle of the night, and unless she asked, he never mentioned what he was doing.  
“I will. Don’t worry. I just need to be sure that there is something to tell. You have a lot to worry about, I wouldn’t want to add to that with minor inconveniences - such as nosy trolls”.

The jacket was removed faster than she’d anticipated, and she heard the drop of his shoes as they hit the floor seconds later. He folded his jacket together with his turtleneck that he often wore, and so only his pants were left when he stood from the bed to unzip them.  
  
He seemed so at home in his actions, and Barbara felt her heartbeat speed up at the sight of his bare back. And then he froze.  
He slowly turned around to look at her, uncertainty clear on his face and doubt evident in his posture. 

“D-do you want me to get a set of pajamas? I’m sorry, I hadn’t even considered..” He looked worried.

It was odd, she had seen him without his clothes on a few times now, but it was mostly because they lived in the same house. Sure, they got intimate every now and then, but they had only ever gone all the way once since he, well, moved in.  
  
Walter had set up in a spare room on the top floor, one that was used as an office before, and he had a small bed, a dresser, and some shelves in there at this point. The basement held most of his personal belongings, at least until he’d agree to unpack them and place them in the house as they were meant to. Barbara hoped that maybe he would one day… she wanted him to stay.  
  
They lived together, and she loved it.  
The realization had come to Barbara before they had made love the first time when she came home late from a stressful shift at the hospital.  
He had been a constant presence for months after the battle, but those days were filled with stress and worry, and they had both needed it - needed something real.  
Not the worry for her son, for her city, for everyone that had suffered at the hands of the king of the gumm-gumms.  
  
She wanted to be needed, to have her mind focus on something else, on _someone_ else.  
She had been in love with him once, and her body and mind wanted him that night - so she’d taken him.  
  
She didn’t think she could’ve been more afraid than when they all stared death in the eyes, but she was wrong.  
Now that things had settled and gotten to become mundane, the nightmares had come. She re-lived those moments in the giant troll’s grasp, and every night it got worse.  
She would get torn apart, she would get gulped down, smashed against rock and she swore she felt her bones _break_ in the waking world.  
  
Being comfortable with her new reality, with what she had lived through, that was still miles away, but right at this moment, she was more than happy to have Walter sleep by her side.  
There was no doubt in her mind that she loved him once more, and thus he was the best remedy for her broken mind these days.

“You can go get some if you’re more comfortable that way?” She caught herself blushing at that moment. How very schoolgirl like, why would she feel timid? - she had been with him, knew how he felt inside her - with her. There was no reason to feel embarrassed.  
  
It didn’t matter to her, right? She wanted him to stay, to sleep beside her like a best friend… like a lover. Yes, her lover - maybe one day, her husband… It didn’t hurt to dream of that once again. Right?  
“Or if you prefer to sleep in just your boxers, I mean... I don’t mind! Either way is… I just want you to be comfortable.”  
She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and chuckled nervously. “I mean, I was the one who made you come in here… made you stay.”  
  
He seemed to relax at that, and the soft smile he offered was enough to calm her nerves.  
“I’ll go get some bottoms then. If you don’t mind. A full set can be rather warm, but I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”  
  
She shook her head and a small grin displayed softly on her lips at his gentleman-like behavior.  
She scooted to where he was currently moving to go for the door, and with more nerve than she really possessed at that moment, she grabbed his arm and they both stilled.  
“Drop the pants and get in here.” She jabbed as her eyes rose to meet his, and her body was ridden with anxiety as well as excitement at his reaction - which was one of utter dumbfoundedness.  
  
He was endearing at times, and Barbara loved him for it. She couldn’t care less about his modesty, or the modesty he apparently tried to uphold for her - at least not right now.  
She let go of his arm as he nodded, and once he’d finished taking off his pants and folding them on top of his growing stack of clothes, the bed once again dipped as he lifted the covers and crept in beside her.  
  
She sighed as he laid down beside her, and soon they were facing each other. Several minutes passed where he just observed her, and though Barbara would usually feel a little insecure being watched like that, she found that she rather liked it - especially how his pupils dilated and his breathing calmed.  
“Are you… okay? Now, I mean.” He whispered suddenly, and Barbara felt an urge to get even closer, to feel safe. So she did.  
  
She maneuvered her body to lay within a hair’s breadth of his own, and it was actually Walter that braved the last few inches between them to hold her close.  
He was in his human form, and his warm flesh felt smooth under her hands as she snuck her arms around his waist to rest on the small of his back.  
  
The children that had been trapped in the Darklands for centuries were beyond saving, at least for now. It would take powerful magic, akin to that of Merlin himself, to revert their biological code to that of a toddler, should they ever leave the time bubble they were currently encased in. They could remove the children that had only been trapped for a few years, a decade at most, and return their biology to the timestamp they were in when they were… well, stolen.  
When it went beyond that, it got hard, and Walter had been extremely irritated that he couldn’t do much more than wait and bide his time. He was studying ancient text after ancient text, and it seemed to Barbara like it had become an obsession for him.  
  
Well, it was his kinds fault anyway, that the children were in that situation to begin with, so she suspected it was fair. She just hated seeing him exhausted and down like that.  
For someone who had been forced to always be selfish, she had found that Walter was actually extremely selfless. Sure, he had returned and fought alongside them mostly because he didn’t want to lose her, but he had still put his life on the line. 

And now he had uprooted his life to come and stay with her, to figure this thing out - together.  
  
They had released around 20 of the babies from the last decade, starting with the newest additions to the Darklands, and Barbara had thought that the situation would’ve been easy. Release them, get them home, repeat.  
But, it was nothing like that - of course.  
  
When a child was released, their changeling counterpart lost their human form, and that was a hard one to explain to the parents of the kid. Some were old, as old as 5 years old, but the baby they released was a toddler. The parents would have trouble coming to terms with having had a doppelganger living with them for all those years, and stories had to be made up to cover up the children suddenly disappearing from certain areas of the country.  
  
The changelings would return to Arcadia to receive their next mission, or, any sort of information really, and at this point, it was well known that Gunmar had been defeated.  
The changelings that had “century babies”, as Barbara called them, would travel out as agents undercover to the parents and pose as police officers and whatnot, and tell them how their children had run away or… died.

Thank whatever God watched over them for the glamour masks.  
  
And then there were those parents whose changelings were just a year or two old, those who could get their real children back and possibly not notice the change. Those made it all worth it, and Barbara found some hope for their cause when Walter told her about them.  
  
While she couldn’t help much with the magical parts and the politics of how best to do these things, she could work on getting the babies that didn’t have a home anymore, to new homes. She had worked with the city hall to create a sort of adoption center at her house, and they were due to build a new facility to house the infants before they go out to their new families.

These were families, not only from Arcadia, but from all around America. Hopefully, those kids could go on to live happy lives, and never have to deal with trolls again.


	2. Don't lie to Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He looked hurt. The kind of hurt a child shows when a parent scolds them for lying when they told the truth. A betrayed hurt.
> 
> “You need to stop lying to me.” Tears were starting to form at the corner of her eyes once again, but she didn’t waver for even a second. She held onto those jungle green eyes with her own as hard as she could, and she thought about getting up for a split second before he hung his head and sighed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Barbara muses about how hard everything has been since the battle of Arcadia - how much it has changed them both.  
> Then she decides all that can wait.

“Please, tell me what you are thinking about. You seem so far away.” He sounded nervous, and Barbara thought she felt his body growing slightly clammy and cold.  
“I’m… glad you’re here. With me. I know I said it before, but I feel like I can’t say it enough.”   
  
He exhaled and smiled, and she couldn’t help but smile back at him.   
His eyes, though the lighting in the room was dim if not completely dark and that probably aided the effect, shone with a green sheen almost like magic.   
She moved the arm that wasn’t trapped beneath them up to cup his cheek, and he leaned into it, turning his head slightly and kissed her palm.

After their first time together they had been passionate in their continued affection, and they showed each other just how much they meant to the other often. Long, intense hugs that grew to reassuring strokes up and down the other’s body, eventually turned to passionate petting and groping.  
Their kisses were heavier and with more meaning now, and Barbara would often grow breathless at how much Walt actually seemed to adore her.   
He was excellent at paying her as much attention as he could, always being mindful of what she wanted and needed, and sometimes she felt as if he’d learned to read her like one of his books.   
  
The heat had returned naturally to her body as the nightmare from earlier tapered off all by itself, but now her flesh was heating up for other reasons. The way he leaned into her, even if it was just her hand, sent her flesh sparkling and crackling.   
Her blood was electric and she leaned in to softly place her forehead against his.   
He felt her intentions before she even acted upon them, and he closed his eyes as they met in the middle once again, head to head, flesh to flesh.   
  
“I… I love you. Barbara, I hope you know that.” He shuddered as he gently nudged her nose with his own, his eyes holding hers in a vice grip of feelings.   
He was completely baring himself to her, and Barbara almost wanted to cry again.   
He had told her before, said it a few times when they were joking around.   
_Love how you wrinkle your nose, love when your hair comes loose, love when you’re so tired you get all cute and cuddly, love… You._   
  
“I… love you too, Walt.” She felt like she should hesitate, mull it over in her mind. _Do you really want to love like that again?_ But, it felt natural. Like they were meant to be here right now, confessing over and over again how much they loved each other.   
She was turning into such a sap. But she couldn’t help it, not with him so close to her right now.  
  
She nudged his nose back and her eyes dropped to his slightly parted lips. Before he could react she pushed her own lips against his, slowly and gently.  
  
He hummed in approval, a smile forming on his face as he kissed her back.   
They were taking their time, taking each other in, savoring the feeling of their lips touching. Barbara crept closer, sighing into him and she felt his hands move to her hips as her own hands stroked a pattern up his back to lay on his shoulders.   
The arm beneath him was starting to get a buzzy feeling as the blood circulation was being cut off, so Barbara gently pulled him towards her.   
Her intentions registered with him as soon as he saw how dark her eyes had become, and he rolled them over to hover above her. His lips grew heavier against her own, and she parted hers to let him inside.   
  
His tongue danced across her upper teeth and she moaned into his mouth as he squeezed her thighs. Not one to be outdone so easily, Barbara entangled his tongue with her own, loving the taste of coffee on him.   
Her heart was racing as she felt a heavy pressure in her stomach, her arousal becoming evident as her core ached and a familiar rush of heat collected below.   
  
He groped her legs further, kneading the flesh, and Barbara planted her feet on the mattress to push her hips upwards towards his crotch.   
He let her lips go with a gasp as they touched and Barbara moaned as she felt him.   
He was definitely getting hard.   
  
“Fuck, Walt”   
  
“Ever so eloquent my dear, though I suppose I wouldn’t oppose to that“.   
  
She pinched his shoulder and shot him a look. “You know what I mean, you… dork.”   
He chuckled and she blushed as he nuzzled the side of her chin, the gesture sending flutters into her stomach.   
“Indeed” He breathed into her skin, taking in her scent, and she sighed at the hot air when it hit her.   
“G-gods” he groaned as he ground himself against her pelvic bone, and there was no hiding how ready he was this time, and it almost made her whimper again.   
  
“Dog” she teased, and he laughed.   
  
“Would you hold it against me if I said I haven’t been able to stop thinking about this?” He whispered into her neck, and she shivered at the thought of him; distracted while working, trying to sate himself, as she had done when she thought about them like this.   
“N-no” she gasped as the rubbing went lower and settled at the inside of her thigh. She was sure the slow, dragging motions were making a mess of her underwear, as well as his own.   
  
She let her hand travel down her stomach, the back of her hand touching his lower abdomen, then his navel, and then the waistband of his trousers. Her fingers ghosted at the edge of her panties, and she hooked them into the waistband to pull them down.   
Walter’s hand met her own as he helped her, and soon she kicked off her white cotton panties which landed somewhere at the foot of the bed beneath the covers.   
  
Electricity ghosted over the skin of her thighs and down into her toes as Walter let his hand glide back up along her inner thigh to settle near her sex. He caressed the skin there, the juncture of her pelvis, and his thumb grazed her folds sweetly, caringly.   
  
“Are you sure? I mean.. you must still be pretty shaken?”   
  
His voice betrayed him as it trembled, but she knew the concern was genuine. The small touch, almost an unnoticeable pressure on her was maddening, and she twisted her hips slightly to rub herself against his thumb.   
It entered between her folds, and his hand instinctively shifted to cover her with his palm, his middle finger stroking her, but not entering completely.   
  
“I can do this for you if you need it to sleep” He murmured, still settled at her neck and the vibrations on her skin made her almost sob.   
“You don’t sleep either.”   
  
She didn’t know why she needed to mention it. Her burden was the nightmares, his; insomnia. He kept himself awake, for when he didn’t, his monsters came.   
And they were eerily similar to hers.   
That’s why they fit together like this. They were broken. Uneven cracks upon their soiled surfaces, but perhaps their jagged edges would fit together - she hoped they would. One day.   
  
“I can go weeks without sleeping dear, it’s in my anatomy. And all the better to keep myself busy with work anyway. Don’t worry about it.”   
His hand stilled, and Barbara felt the loss like a whiplash on her back.   
_How many times had he been whipped? Really whipped._ _  
_ _  
_ “I see how tired you are Waltholomew Stricklander, I am a nurse. You can’t hide such things from me”.   
He rose from her side and stared down at her, his hand leaving her sex and the other her thigh. He supported his weight above her as his eyes shone a dangerous jungle green, taking in her expression as his own hardened.   
“You… never call me that. No one calls me that.”   
  
He looked hurt. The kind of hurt a child shows when a parent scolds them for lying when they told the truth. A betrayed hurt.   
“You need to stop lying to me.” Tears were starting to form at the corner of her eyes once again, but she didn’t waver for even a second. She held onto those jungle green eyes with her own as hard as she could, and she thought about getting up for a split second before he hung his head and sighed.   
  
His shoulders slumped, and as he rolled off of her, Barbara mourned the loss of his warmth immediately.   
He laid on his back and brought his hands to his eyes, pressing the palm of them against his closed eyelids, and groaned.   
“I know. I’m sorry.” He croaked in defeat.   
  
It wasn’t the victory Barbara wanted, she felt bad about it. But she knew she was right; Walter was exhausted.   
It showed in his posture, his speech, but mostly in his eyes. Whenever he got really angry with something, his eyes would flash a dangerous yellow and red, but as of late, they simply seemed to shine a bit greener.   
He didn’t have the stamina to do this whole… aftermath of the end of the world. She imagined he was getting… old, perhaps? Even a spy and a soldier of his rank would grow old, weary, and… tired.   
  
The grey of his hair, those silver strings that carried over into his troll form. To Barbara, they were endearing, and certainly something akin to a silver fox and all that came with that terminology. But they were also evidence of his age, of his service to the eons. Of his wars.   
  
She reached out and let her fingers brush those silver strands gently, and he lowered his hands and turned to look at her.   
His eyes were so heavy with fatigue now, and Barbara realized he’d held back before, shielding this from her - to not make her worry. He wasn’t anymore though.   
  
She scooted closer to him once again and lay her hand on his chest right above his heart, and she felt how it hammered away against his ribcage.   
“How much energy does it take for you to stay in your human form?”   
  
“Not much. At this point, I don’t even feel the toll anymore.”   
  
“But it does tire you to maintain it?”   
  
He chuckled light-heartedly and looked at her with such devotion in his eyes.   
“I feel comfortable like this. Besides, I don’t even know which form of mine to call natural anyway. Sure, I stole this appearance… but after so many years, it feels more _right_ than…”   
  
He sighed and closed his eyes once more.   
Barbara studied his face then. If she didn’t know him the way she did, she would’ve never guessed he was anything but human.   
  
“Should we sleep at least? I mean, we are both exhausted… Perhaps it would do us good.” She tried, sort of awkwardly as the mood had broken and dissipated.   
  
“I can stay with you till you fall asleep, my dear, but I need to be on my way within the hour…”   
  
She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Even after admitting how tired he was?   
“You have to be kidding me - Walt! You need to stay here, rest up… at least until dawn breaks, that’ll give you a few hours.”   
It wasn’t unusual for her to use her “mom-voice” on him. Perhaps it was just a habit she couldn’t break really, but it had often helped her in persuading him into telling her things.   
He huffed and looked at her, something stern crossing over his eyes like a flash.   
“If I wait till dawn, my sources will disappear into their dark crevices for the day, and their intel could be of utter importance. I need-”   
  
“Could be. Could be, Walt.” She cut him off.   
“But sleep _would_ be beneficial. Talk to them tomorrow night, or evening! Just… stay. Please.”   
  
He seemed to mull it over, and Barbara waited for the retort.   
But it never came - he simply turned to stare at the ceiling, his gaze far away.   
She was grateful that he had listened, but Barbara didn’t want to fall asleep without clearing the air. She didn’t need the drama when he would eventually sneak out in about an hour anyway.   
  
“Good boy” she teased, and Walter wrinkled his nose in disdain.   
  
“Back to the dog part again, are we?” He chided, trying to sound offended, or maybe... he really was.   
_You are a dog, and this is your leash!_   
  
“You humped my leg not five minutes ago,” She said smugly.   
This time, he laughed.   
  
A part of their dynamic that she really loved was their way to joke, even when things got serious. The drama came natural, but so did the familiarity and the teasing. Much like you’d experience with a best friend, she supposed.   
  
“My apologies, I didn’t know you were a cat person” he retorted, but Barbara was, apparently, in a witty-comeback-mood. Sometimes sleep-deprivation does that to you.   
  
“I thought you liked the taste of cat”   
  
Her eyes were sultry when they met his, and the double innuendo didn’t take long for him to get. He nearly choked on air as his eyes went comically wide, and Barbara felt like; perhaps she wasn’t at all ready to sleep anyway.   
And she needed to _really_ tire him out. To get him to stay.   
  
“Not so tired then, are we? It seems your mind is fully awake and elsewhere at the same time. If only Jim could hear you, such… indecency.” He smirked, though Barbara tried not to ruin the mood once again at the thought of her son.   
She really needed to sleep at some point, but she also needed _something else._   
  
Her fingers tapped his chest a few times and then started to slowly descent down his stomach on a clear path towards his briefs.   
  
“Barbara, what are you-”   
  
Her hand dipped beneath the waistband and swiftly gripped him just beneath the head. He was taller than her in any of his forms, this one included, but she made due as she arched her back forward and prodded his side with her knee, slightly draping her leg over his hip as she went up against him.   
He sucked in a mouthful of air and closed his eyes involuntarily, a sharp gasp escaping him.   
“I t-thought-”   
  
“Shhh, Walter, it’s okay.”   
  
She raised herself upwards, her other arm resting on the bed as she bent down to kiss his stomach. The hand below started to work a languid rhythm of ups and downs, and Walter seemed to find his composure as he let out a long sigh this time.   
A rumbling sound rose from his chest, almost like a purr, and Barbara laughed a little at that.   
“Perhaps you are a cat after all.”   
He scoffed at that, but not without smiling a little.   
  
She rearranged herself momentarily, and Walter took the chance to look at her once more. There was uncertainty in his eyes.   
Barbara considered the tension for a second but then used both her hands to gently remove the covers that draped over them, and then sat to drag down his briefs.   
The cold air that hit her was a relief, even though she had been shaken and clammy just a few minutes ago.   
  
Walter didn’t dare to move, and he simply watched her as she undid what little clothing he bore. He did sigh when she dragged them off of him, feeling every bit as relieved to have the cold air collide with his own damp skin.   
  
Her eyes roamed over his chest down to his stomach and finally settled at his crotch. She imagined the swirly carvings she had seen there before, his skin a shining color of jade.   
  
“You really don’t have to do this, I understand if-”   
  
“I wouldn’t be doing this if I didn't want to. Trust me.”   
  
Their eyes locked as she shifted her gaze away from his sex, and the small smile she offered him was willingly accepted - He calmed down slightly, though his fingers were playing idly at the sheets.


	3. Nowhere else I'd rather Be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He stuttered slightly, gasping in a lungful of air she feared he might choke on, but god was he beautiful. 
> 
> It was odd to see a man of his stature, of his personality, like this. So vulnerable and open, and completely at her mercy. She felt herself growing warm at the notion, electricity once again dancing across her skin.  
> A blush rose to her cheeks, then spread to her ears, down her neck, and settled at her shoulders. 
> 
> Like a tidal wave of stimulation, and she wasn’t even the one receiving any sort of physical pleasure right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Barbara does her best to get Walter to stay, and in the end, she succeeds.
> 
> (nothing but smut here - kiddies be gone and adults be warned!)

She let a hand rest at the center of his chest, feeling the movement of his breathing, the warmth of his skin. She then slowly started to drag it down, keeping it just a few inches off of him, so that only her fingertips traced down his stomach, featherlight and leaving a trail of hypersensitivity in their wake.  
Walter's breathing shook, and Barbara didn’t know whether it was because he was ticklish, or because the action had the desired effect she wanted.   
As the motions dragged on, she found that she didn’t care.   
  
When she reached his pelvic she let the thumb of her hand gently caress his hip bone, the other fingers splaying just above his sex. She could feel the warmth of her hand spread out across his skin, and their eyes were locked in an intensity that made everything, even this small thing, all the more sensual.

He was about to say something when she took him in hand once more, enjoying how the thrill of seeing his eyes close involuntarily, sent shivers up her spine.   
She moved to straddle his thighs, the hand on his cock moving in slow, dragging motions of ups and downs, and as she got herself comfortable she used her other hand to ground him, placing it at his hip and squeezing him to let him know; she was there.

He stuttered slightly, gasping in a lungful of air she feared he might choke on, but god was he beautiful. It was odd to see a man of his stature, of his personality, like this.  
So vulnerable and open, and completely at her mercy. She felt herself growing warm at the notion, electricity once again dancing across her skin.  
A blush rose to her cheeks, then spread to her ears, down her neck, and settled at her shoulders. Like a tidal wave of stimulation, and she wasn’t even the one receiving any sort of physical pleasure right now.

Her hand sped up, and she watched him intently, noted what he liked, when he lost whatever control he was trying to accumulate, and made sure to slow down when he seemed to near the edge.

Pearls of precum gathered at the head of him, and Barbara smeared them with her thumb to make the movements of her hand smoother, more intense.

“You...you, ah, are..” He gasped, eyes still closed.

Her mouth opened slightly and her own breathing grew ragged. This was better than she had anticipated, and when she couldn’t help it anymore, she rotated her hips and ground against his thighs.  
The high, keening sound she made rocked the man beneath her, and his eyes finally opened to look at her. His pupils were blown wide and his eyes were so dark she thought he might be possessed.   
  
“You’re _magnificent”._ He finally managed, and she could tell he was itching to do… something.   
But he just kept lying there, obedient and at her mercy, and while she would’ve loved to have him come like this, she was pretty sure he wouldn’t have the energy to go through any more tonight, so if she wanted him, she needed to take him. _Now._   
  
She removed her hand from his cock, and brought it down to enter a finger between her folds. She watched him watch her, and she knew he was aching to be the one doing that to her - she could tell by the way he swallowed thickly and fisted his hand in the sheets.   
  
She drew her hand back and paid great attention to his eyes as they looked at her soaked fingers. She was wet, that was no secret, no doubt he’d felt it on his skin as she sat on him, but the image of her glistening fingers was enough to have him _growl_ at her.   
A deep sound that was all troll and Barbara felt more wetness pool in her core as she bit her lower lip.   
“I thought you might like that.” She teased, but it was getting hard to maintain any sort of dominant tone with the way he looked at her.

“What do you want me to do?” He almost hissed.  
The words were as hard and sharp as the rock that made up his ‘natural’ body, and Barbara knew that even though it was meant as a plea, it had come out as a command.

At this point, leaving anything up to the imagination and eventual teasing seemed impossible to Barbara, so she dipped her fingers in once more and made sure to get them nice and wet.  
He didn’t growl this time, but watched her, waiting. She couldn’t say that she was disappointed, because she _knew_ he was not going to be silent for long.   
She brought her hand forth once more and gently took hold of him, stroking him up and down languidly, taking her time on the upstroke and massaging the head with her thumb.   
  
His mouth twitched and his shoulders shook as he fought to stay stern and in control, and that little betrayal of his body was enough to make Barbara smirk to herself.

When he was good and wet her hand left him, and she maneuvered herself to hover her hips above him, and then their eyes locked.  
“You’re so beautiful”. She whispered.   
  
The blush that crept over his face was such a deep color of red, Barbara feared he might faint. She didn’t know why she didn’t compliment him more often, it would only be fair. He was handsome in so many ways, and beautiful in even more, and it wasn’t just his outer appearance.   
“A.. ehm, shouldn’t I be the one saying that?” He chuckled, but she could tell that he appreciated the comment in his own way.

“Traditionally, perhaps, in some cultures. But in other cultures, you would also be the one to stay above me, taking what you wanted - and while I hope you will be enjoying this -”  
She leaned over him, her hands bracing on either side of his head.   
“ _I_ am going to be the one taking you tonight.”   
  
He swallowed and his pupils dilated once more. She couldn’t tell what he was thinking, but as his eyes dropped to her lips, she knew what he wanted.   
So, she closed the distance between them and brought her lips to his. He responded with eagerness, a moan escaping him and for the first time since they started this, he brought his hands up to cup her face.   
She gently grabbed one of his wrists and caressed it as her lips moved over his, but before she could get distracted by the warmth of his kiss, she straightened back up and was starting to move away from his upper body. But to her surprise, he followed her.

He sat up, and the change in position made her scoot to sit at his stomach, just above his pelvic.  
“Forgive me, you can do anything that you want, anything you _need_ . As long as you don’t leave…” He finished his sentence by kissing her again, and Barbara didn’t have it in her to feel disappointed that their position had changed.   
His tongue brushed across her lips, and she kissed him open-mouthed in return.   
Her hands snaked around his neck to cup his head, her fingers kneading through his hair, messing it up.   
As she dragged her fingernails against his scalp he growled again, and his tongue slipped inside her mouth with vigor.

She didn’t want to imagine how long he’d wished to experience this, to be kissed like this, held like this. She’d had a taste of it, a long time ago, with James. Back when they were actually in love, but she couldn’t know for sure if Walter had ever experienced these things before.  
His reactions were powerful and hungry, and his hands raked up her sides, caressing the skin he found, kneading his fingers into it.   
She gasped and moaned at the motions, and then she drew back at the same time his knees bent up to rest his legs at either side of her. She then slowly descended upon him.   
  
It was clumsy, at first. She’d wanted to use her hands to position him, to make sure he would slip inside without any difficulty, but she couldn’t bear to let him go.   
With some wiggling, she found the right angle and let him slowly fill her.

“G-gods!” He gasped, and she all but nodded in agreement as she sunk her face into the space between his shoulder and his neck. He smelled of sweat and musk, and Barbara felt herself inhaling sharply and moaning on a breath she couldn’t quite seem to catch. 

The sensation of him inside her would surprise her every time. It was just _right_ like they were made to make each other whole, and Barbara felt a shiver go up her spine as he bottomed out, and she was fully seated in his lap.   
“G-god Walt.. you feel so-”   
  
She couldn’t finish the sentence, all she could do was sit there and be overwhelmed at how right this felt, how perfect it was. He shuddered beneath her, a mumbling of words escaping him to agree with her broken statement. She felt boneless and yet her entire body was so stiff with the sensation of him inside her.

She drew up a bit, moaning at the new sensation crashing through her, and at the low growl that emitted from Walters’s throat.  
His hands gripped her, hard, and she noted how they almost dragged her upwards, guiding her. He wanted so badly to take control, but he was letting her decide. Her heart leaped at the thought.   
She followed his demands, deciding to be kind, and continued to rise till he nearly excited her once more, and then she retreated downwards again.

His pulse was racing, and she nuzzled against his neck, chasing the sensation of the electricity pulsing beneath his skin. For every inch that filled her she felt her heart swell and beat against her ribcage. The pace was slow, languid, and devouring, and Barbara could feel the desperation in her lover to _go faster._   
  
If she’d let him, he’d take her as hard and rough as a troll could, she could sense that. He was trembling and growling, but instead of taking control, he chased after her lips and seized them in a passionate outburst of moans and sighs.   
Her eyes rolled back as his tongue once again breached her lips, and then a sharp buck from his hips met her as he once again bottomed out. It resulted in a high keening noise being drawn from the back of her throat, and he _snarled_ against her mouth.

“F- _fuck!_ ”   
  
The sound fluttered into her stomach and left her gasping. It turned into exciting waves of pleasure shooting directly to her core, and she almost laughed at how good it felt. Walter rarely swore in such a crude way, so when he did, she was always surprised. In this certain scenario, she was sobbing _wet_ because of it. She bit her lower lip, her core burning with desire and overflowing with wetness, she knew she must feel scorching hot to him.   
Another buck of his hips, and oh, how he fought. With all his might she imagined, he fought against his own instincts to simply claim her. To thrust up and into her in such a way that would leave no doubt; she was his, and he was hers.

She retreated back up, her thighs shaking with the effort, for she too wanted to go wild - to lose control. So why didn’t she? She slammed back down that rocked both of them to their core - oh, nevermind then.  
 _It felt like heaven_ and she needed so much more of it.

Her breathing picked up as her speed did, and she felt Walters fingernails dig into her skin, heard how his teeth barred with a hiss and wondered if his heart fluttered the same way hers did at this moment.  
Up once more, and down again with such vigor, she felt she should faint at the end with exhaustion. But that was the plan, was it not? To finally get some sleep? It was a bonus, she mused - right now, all that mattered was the beautiful man gasping and moaning beneath her.

Walter started to suck at her neck, and Barbara drew in a sharp breath as fangs ghosted over her skin. A tingling sensation spread to her shoulders and down her back as he kept tasting her, his tongue and lips leaving hot trails of liquid fire on her.  
He twitched inside her, and Barbara grabbed at his shoulders, braced herself better on her knees on either side of his narrow hips, and kept her tempo of ups and downs as best she could.   
  
His tongue trailed down her clavicle, like molten gold painting ores into her, the feeling of him lingering long after he’d left, and only when he couldn’t go any lower due to their position did he return once more to devour her neck.

The sounds that emanated from him were desperate and filled with praise. His mouth fell open as she picked up the speed once more, and his fangs and tusks were very evident now, and Barbara felt her stomach muscles spasm at the sight of them. 

It sent him growling again, no doubt he’d felt the clamp around him, and his hands flew to her backside to knead at her.  
His cock pumping inside her, the troll-turned-man drew her upwards with urgency and down with desperation, and beads of sweat were forming on both their foreheads - their eyes locking as they gasped for air in unison.   
  
“Y-you’re so-! Ah, a-amazing!” He slurred the words at her and directly into her heart.   
She laughed breathlessly, pressing her forehead against his.   
  
He closed his eyes and bucked up once more as she came down to meet him, and Barbara felt that familiar coil starting to settle in her core. It could spring in a second, or it could spring tomorrow, but right now she just wanted to see him come undone.

She craved it, _needed it_ , and she swore to herself that he wouldn’t be allowed to leave her side for the rest of the night.   
_I need him close. Closer than this, even if it isn’t possible. I love him._ _  
_ _  
_ She moaned loudly at those thoughts and snaked her hands into his hair to grab at the silver, entangling her fingers and digging her nails into his scalp.

“AH, Ba-Barbara! N-Nearly - _Gods!_ Nearly th-there!”

His brow furrowed and his features sharpened in a grimace of deep pleasure and pain. He was dancing at the edge of a cliff, and she knew it would be a plunge he would happily take.  
She needed to tumble with him, to catch him as he fell, and to promise that she’d be a constant. That she would not leave, and that it would take death to part them.

His skin was going jade in hue and his hair coarser by the second, but despite his fatigue and the situation at hand, he didn’t change. Didn’t flicker, as he had last time, and Barbara didn’t know what it meant.  
Maybe he was exerting himself so as to not lose control. Something he seemed to be doing lately. Maybe it felt better for him in this form, or maybe it wasn’t important. The sound of their skin meeting, a constant sound of passion raced alongside her pulse, and her ears started to hum as she felt the telltale electricity going through her core.   
  
“FUck Walt! I’m going to-!”   
  
A skittering motion in his thrusts indicated his climax, and no sooner had she felt it when she heard him roar into her skin, the sound ripped between the low guttering growl of a troll and the man she had known him as for so long now.   
It was the feeling of him emptying inside her that sent her over. The warmth that spread in like a tidal wave swept away any clammy coldness from her nightmare, and she felt her nerves sing as they both collapsed back onto the bed, Walt covering her as his back shook with the effort of not crashing into her completely.   
  
His hips conjured stuttering little thrusts as they both came down from their respective highs, and Barbara felt a soreness spread through her thighs. She would feel it tomorrow, that was for sure. But tomorrow could wait.   
  
“Co-come ‘ere.” _I need you close._   
She reached for him, and he let her tug him closer, their skin hitting once again, but this time it was a bit more kid-friendly. His damp chest covered hers, and as she stroked his back with her fingertips, she felt his heart through his ribcage. It took him several seconds to withdraw himself from inside her, but when he did, she felt empty. _Closer._

His breathing was ragged, but his face wore a goofy smile that Barbara could’ve snatched up and kept in her pockets forever. Moments like these, and expressions like that, worked wonders for her mind.  
She nuzzled her nose against his as her own breathing started to calm down, and the appreciative hum it earned her was enough to get her smiling all silly-like as well.

“One feels almost young again - don’t you think?”  
She snorted and let her hand splay at the small of his back, feeling his spine through his skin. _It’s made of stone, and stone lasts centuries._ _  
_ “Speak for yourself. I’m not old. Not compared to you, old man.”

“Touché.” He grunted, but not without humor.  
  
He cracked his neck a little, a sigh escaping him, and Barbara thought she did see the years on him at that moment. Those centuries had made a stone-cold killer of him, and yet here she was, covered by his naked form and entangled in his embrace. His eyes opened slowly to meet hers, and they glistened with a green hue that she could never grow tired of.   
They gave him away. The way they glowed and shifted in the light, but they were so _enthralling._   
  
She noticed then that Walter was studying her, as he did every now and then. As he did everything really, and Barbara couldn’t help but wonder what he saw. Who was she to an ancient creature like this?   
  
“You are so beautiful, love.”   
  
The words almost had her hiccuping. She supposed it was a common thing to say after sex, but when it came from Walter, she knew it had a deeper meaning than just post-coital infatuation.   
He brushed aside a piece of her flaming red hair and cradled her cheek in his palm. He seemed content to simply stare at her, and Barbara was glad. She didn’t know what to say back. Well, she _knew_ what to say, she just didn’t know _how._

He kissed her forehead and as his face lowered, his lips lingered over hers once more. She braced the expanse between them and heard him hum low in his throat. She could lie here forever like this, with the man that had saved her and her son’s life. Let Gunmar rot in his grave and let his ghost try to haunt me - I will get over it eventually.

The kiss drew on until they were both gasping for air once more, but Barbara saw the dark circles beneath Walter’s eyes and pushed against him to make him sit up.  
He caught on and removed himself from her person, but before he could worry that he’d done something wrong, she pushed him back down onto the mattress, his head hitting the pillow as she followed him down. 

She grabbed at the covers and drew them up to cover them both, laying down at Walter’s side, one leg splayed against his stomach while she cradled herself into the crook of his arm. 

He reacted with content relief and rested his chin on top of her hair, a sigh escaping him.  
As tender moments passed by, she felt him kiss her hair gently and smile into it afterward.   
“You’ve drawled yourself over me to stop me from leaving, haven’t you?”

“You wouldn’t dare to leave now. The leg is for comfort.” She said, and closed her eyes, feigning going to sleep.

He chuckled, and several seconds ticked by once again. They felt like individual eternities.   
She knew he was staring into the ceiling, his mind starting to race again with whatever business he had in the morning.   
Sleep is for the blessed, unrest is for the wicked - but surely he had earned redemption by now. Herself, too.

Barbara sighed and let a hand slide onto his chest to rest above his heart. Soon he placed a hand on top of hers, the warmth from his palm lulling her into real sleep.  
“You wouldn’t dare to leave now…” She whispered.

“How right you are Darling.” He whispered back, his tone growing heavy with fatigue, and Barbara knew she had succeeded.

She nuzzled into the crook of his neck and sighed, “sleep now, Dear - the world can wait.”


End file.
